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Welcome to my blog! I'm an American exchange student in the Netherlands just trying to make it.  Join me on my adventure!

Living With Same-Sex Parents

Living With Same-Sex Parents

I had a hard time coming up with a title for this post.  I wanted it to be something clear, but I also feel like it’s too impersonal.  To me, my host moms Luts and Patricia are much more than “same-sex parents”, they’re just my parents.

   About two months after I received the “congratulations, you’ve been accepted!” email, I got a call from AFS.  

   “We found a host family for you.  It is a home with same-sex parents and I just wanted to call and ask if you were ok with it” my representative said.

   I didn’t hesitate a second in saying yes.  Of course, why wouldn’t I be ok with that? I was so excited that I even forgot to ask what the rest of the family was like and to ask my parents if they were okay with it.  I called back five minutes later.

   The objective of my exchange was to take on new experiences and live through different perspectives - this was just an unexpected addition to that.  I honestly had no reservations and I was beyond excited to meet my host family. Then, other people started voicing their opinions. Some of my friends reluctantly asked me if I was really okay with it, others told me that it would be uncomfortable.  Adults talked quietly to my mom, questioning my safety and asking if I should have been in a traditional household. I didn’t share any of their sentiments, but I couldn’t help but think, should I?

   As I landed in the Netherlands I focused on the way that I felt, not others, and there they were, standing at Schipol with a massive “Welcome Home!” banner (they would hold a similar banner as I walked through security one year later).  And sure, I was nervous that first day, but it had nothing to do with the makeup of my host family.

   You may expect me to tell you that living with two moms was no different and that life was the exact same, but that just wouldn’t be true.

   Here’s what was different about living with two moms:

  • Bathroom situation sometimes takes a little longer

  • “Girl talk” is a 24/7 affair

  • Lots more family rom-coms

  • It was easy to be open from the get go

   This is what was the same:

  • The love

my host family!

my host family!

   Of course, things are going to be different, it’s a different family, but one thing that I can guarantee is that love is the same.  I spent a year with Luts, Patries, and Kim and I can honestly say that they were the best part of my year, they’re my family. The love I felt in that family is the same as the love I feel in my biological one. Love is love is love.

why home is hard

why home is hard